The
Get Engaged
Tour , organized by Marriage Equality USA, was a recent set of
meetings held throughout the state of California, including one here in Fresno,
which I participated in with other local LGBT groups and activists. The
meetings solicited communities to come out, listen to results of polling data
concerning public opinion on same sex marriage, and to offer up opinions and
ideas of how the battle for marriage equality should move forward. The tour
ended a couple of weeks ago, with the results shared at a summit held last
weekend in San Bernardino. You can watch some of the video of the summit HERE. (Apparently technical problems resulted in
some video being lost, and be prepared for a difficult time watching some of
the meeting, as the camera was swung and jerked around far too much and audio
is less than great. How about setting the camera up in one place in the back of
the room so we don't get a headache and we can at least follow the
conversation?)
From
virtually all honest accounts, the meeting was not good. Contentious and
divided, there still seems to be no clear strategy in sight. Unite The Fight
called the meeting an utter failure on their blog, going into great
detail about our now fractured movement. The blog hit more than a few nails on
the head when it pointed out that anyone with a different point of view in this
movement is ridiculed and has their head bitten off, and that a few massive egos
are derailing any chance of unity simply because they want to be the ones with
the brass ring in their hand at the end of the ride. (I'll add that I couldn't
find anything on the Unite the Fight site about who runs it, and blog entries
are simply credited to "Unite The Fight". And with such a strong
opinion in the blog about unity and not ridiculing other groups, it seems
strange that in their list of action sites, virtually everyone is mentioned
with the exception of EQCA.)
Click on Read More below for the rest of this article...
Lawrence King
, at the age of 15, was shot and killed by a classmate on February 12, 2008.
His pre-trial began Monday, July 20th, 2009. Tactics were vivid on the first day.
Vivid, and tragically repetitive.
UPDATE:
JUDGE ORDERS MCINERNEY TO STAND TRIAL FOR THE MURDER OF LAWRENCE KING, STATING
THAT THE MURDER WAS CLEARLY PRE-MEDITATED. CLICK HERE
FOR THE STORY.
Defense attorney Scott Wippert seems to be taking the
path to a gay panic defense
for his client, Brandon McInerney. When questioning one of
the police officers involved, Wippert asked if the officer was aware that King
had been making sexual advances toward McInerney, which "provoked"
him. He added that King "taunted" McInerney with his
"effeminate" ways.
In 2009, the year that would have been Harvey Milk's
79th birthday, 31 years after he was murdered by a man who got off easy because
his lawyers argued he was stressed, complicated by the fact that he had too
much sugar in his system, the infamous "twinkie defense",
it's demeaning to see crazy tactics still being used in courts of law.
And I can see it working in this case. Remember, the
boys were just that, boys, and as such, can often find excuses as flimsy as
this in courts of law. Their minds aren't fully developed yet, they don't have
the judgment that adults are supposed to have. Add to this the fact that King
was dressing in girls' clothing, something Americans can't seem to deal with to
this day, and you can see how this might go. If Americans are still so repulsed
by the idea of flirtation by someone of the same sex that they're willing to
use it as an excuse for cold blooded murder, you can also see how far we, as a
movement, have yet to go.
Something's really wrong with Americans. The fact that
so many other countries are evolving into humans, rather than subjects, should
urge us to some epiphany to the error of our ways. It should be an emergency, what's
happening to Americans whose biology falls somewhere outside pure heterosexuality.
Despite evidence, despite truth, despite the promise of protection from the
constitution and the courts, we've become the only minority in this country who
are not allowed equal rights. And with gay bashings are on the rise and lawyers
still willing to do anything to keep murderers free, who knows how much more
hell we have to go through.
Maybe, just maybe, all this hope that we've put into
the American people is fruitless. Maybe, just maybe, we aren't smart enough or strong
enough to shoulder simple things like human sexuality, or truth. I've learned a
tragic fact in recent years. Maybe, just maybe, Americans, in a slight
majority, are too stupid to move forward.
Read more about the Lawrence King trial by clicking HERE
When I first heard of the federal case for same sex
marriage I agreed with some of the things I read. Maybe this was the wrong
time. Maybe it was doomed to fail, based on the history of other challenges
which weren't supported by a majority on a state level.
I've been there since, wondering what the right answer
is. I still don't know, in terms of legal success. But after reading a recent
article, written by David Boies, one of the lawyers in the case, I'm hopeful.
I've never felt this issue had anything to do with
anyone's personal opinion, as those voting to restrict civil rights, do. This
is a matter of law, of reverence to the words as written in our founding
documents. The reason Christians and others opposed to legal same sex marriage
avoid the constitution is because there's nothing that can help them there. The
constitution only hurts them, destroys them, in fact, supporting none of their
platforms.
Until recently, Americans who denounce
non-heterosexuals and deny us our rights, haven't had much to worry about. It's
only in our very recent history that we've demanded marriage equality. While
it's been tossed around in the past, it's never been anywhere near as big an
issue as it is now, and it's never had such a large group of Americans behind
it. In the past, it wasn't running through conservative minds that certain
legal judgments, which were based on the equality of the constitution, would
open the doors for gay marriage in the future. The idea that non-heterosexual
Americans would demand marriage equality was ridiculous. It wasn't on their
radar.
Somehow, this issue of marriage
equality, which is a simple and clear cut case of equal rights for all
Americans, has been hijacked to the "will of the people". Despite the
fact that the California Supreme Court ruled only last year that to deny same
sex couples the right to the word marriage was to, in effect, deny them
equality, they ignored their own decision and allowed the majority to restrict
the minority. This isn't how law works in this nation. Why did it go that way?
I don't know, but it sound like the lawyers in the Federal Case know exactly
what the truth of this issue is, and they intend to present it.
Even though I'll work with others if a
ballot measure becomes a reality, I don't believe for one second that it's the
right thing to do. It may be our only option at this moment, but it's certainly
not right for us to take equal rights to the ballot box when we denounce others
for doing it. So hopefully a federal case can be heard and can succeed, and put
an end to all this insanity.
The article by David Boies begins with
this...
"When I got married in California in 1959 there were almost
20 states where marriage was limited to two people of different sexes and the
same race. Eight years later the Supreme Court unanimously declared state bans
on interracial marriage unconstitutional.
Recently, Ted Olson and I brought a lawsuit asking the courts to
now declare unconstitutional California's Proposition 8 limitation of marriage
to people of the opposite sex. We acted together because of our mutual
commitment to the importance of this cause, and to emphasize that this is not a
Republican or Democratic issue, not a liberal or conservative issue, but an
issue of enforcing our Constitution's guarantee of equal protection and due
process to all citizens."
Our battle has never been so eloquently
presented as it is in this article, in my opinion. Read the full article HERE
Introducing our very own Sara Scott. She is a local friend, author and fellow crusader in the equality battle. Among other accomplishments, Sara has just written and published her first book, BloodRite: Dominique. The book officially launches on August 31, 2009 but you can pre-order the book NOW!
Sara has graciously decided to donate 25% of her book sales to the Courage Campaign, starting now through August 19, 2009. So don't delay, support a local author and support our cause for equality all at the same time.
Visit her website atwww.sarasscott.com to find out more about her, the book and also to pre-order your copy today!
Stay tuned for book signing dates and events soon!!
To increase our exposure and visibility in the larger comunity, we are going to try a series of monthly lunches on the town. We will gather in a different community each month. The more PFLAG t-shirts we can have, the better. Any diversity or civil-rights oriented clothing is okay.
WHEN
Sunday, August 23, 2009 12:30 pm
WHERE
Porterville. Restaurant to be determined.
ACTION REQUIRED
We hope to be a fairly significant "presence". We will need an accurate approximate number of diners, so we can make arrangements with the restaurant.
As
much as LGBT Americans have against them in 2009, it seems almost insignificant
compared to life in the 1960's. Social repression in the 1950's and before
resulted in a wave of rebellion in the 1960's. LGBT Americans migrated to
larger cities, and established a sizable population in Greenwich Village,
NY. The city had laws against homosexuality in public and private
business, but policing all places of business was a strain on authorities.
Since there were few places LGBT people could gather safely, bars were the
hangouts.
A
harsher crackdown on homosexuality began with the approach of the 1964 World's
Fair. Wanting the city to appear pristine, the mayor ordered authorities to
clean up the streets. Police worked to entrap homosexuals as often as possible,
posing undercover in parks and public places. Raids on gay bars were frequent.
Police seized alcohol, lined up customers and demanded IDs. Men dressed in full
drag were immediately arrested. Women not having at least 3 pieces of feminine
clothing on were arrested. Bars were so used to the procedure that they often
kept more alcohol hidden, sometimes in a car down the street, so they could
re-open. Homosexuals were arrested simply over a perception they could become
disorderly. Coming out in 1969 was virtually unthinkable.
Click on Read More below for the rest of this article...
Last year I highly recommended the
HBO Documentary, "MIDDLE SEXES - REDEFINING HE & SHE". The
film explores all forms of human sexuality and gender identity. Narrated by
Gore Vidal, it's forthright, honest and revelatory. These issues have become
commonplace in the media over the last few years, and although I'm constantly
doing research for pieces I write on Gay Fresno, I wasn't finding the answers I
needed on subjects such as being transgendered or on the topic of sexual
reassignment. I simply didn't understand the layers of complexity involved with
the human nature between heterosexuality and homosexuality.
This documentary, for me, was a
crash course in how it all works. When it was over I no longer felt confused by
these issues. While I'm not suggesting one film can answer all questions, this
one covers enough to bring these issues into focus.
Today I accidentally stumbled upon a
YouTube User channel which has uploaded this documentary in several short
videos. For those who've either been unable to see the film on HBO or find the
DVD, this is an easy, free opportunity to see this incredible work. Simply click
on the following link...YouTube
User - Middle Sexes Documentary
"Middle
Sexes" is also available on NETFLIX , or it can be purchased at the HBO STORE or at AMAZON
I am ashamed to admit that I attended my first Tulare/Kings Co. PFLAG meeting this afternoon. I'm not ashamed that I attended, only that this was my first time. What a wonderful group of people! I am so proud of and thankful for Steven and Joan Palmer. They are a marvelous couple who saw a need here in our area and created a safe place for all to come and be themselves. Thank you to the whole PFLAGteam for your dedication, warmth and spirit!
I wasn't hesitant or nervous about attending. Those who know me can see I'm a pretty outgoing person. I honestly just didn't know what to expect or what I would walk away feeling. I'd like to answer that now. There was a great crowd full of diversity, young and not so young, many different local groups were represented, LGBT people, straight allies, parents of LGBT people, etc. There was lots of laughter and a fair share of tears. I heard some things from my mother that I had never heard before. I think they have always been implied but never spoken. It was touching for me and I learned for some others as well. I heard peoples outrage and disappointment over Prop 8. I listened to people who are afraid to be who they are. People who are struggling with family acceptance. I think these are all things everyone can relate to. I think for every person who shared today that there are so many more out there who feel the same, who have been through or are going through the same thing. PFLAG really is about supporting our community in a safe place where everyone can feel comfortable. Where you can share your struggles and take comfort in knowing that you are protected and loved. I urge everyone to come out to the next meeting and experience this for yourselves. You will not leave empty handed but instead with a full heart bursting with friendship, love, and true acceptance.
This meeting has helped fuel my already raging fire. For those parents who want equality and justice for their children, I am dedicated to you. For those people who "kick themselves in the behind" for waiting a bit too long for an event that shouldn't have had a time frame, you will be vindicated, you will get your day. For those people who don't feel 100% comfortable just being themselves, take comfort in knowing that you will always have a place to go with people who will not judge you but stand beside you and fight for the day we are no longer afraid to be ourselves. That place is PFLAG and I am one of the many people who will keep on fighting for you, no matter how long the battle may take. So, thank you PFLAG for the support you bring and the awareness you spread. Thank you everyone who shared today because being vulnerable is never easy. I applaud you, I support you but most of all, I am one of you.
I don't know why I waited so long, don't make the same mistake. Inquire today:
Ever wanted to help out but just didn’t know what to do? Now is your chance to make a difference. Join the Hanford Equality Team and do some Voter ID work. All you need is your cell phone, charger and voice!
We will be meeting on Thursday, June 25th at the Vieira household from 5:30-7:30 pm. Hot Dogs will be provided afterwards.
Do you want to come and join us in the parade and represent Gay Hanford? We would love to have you! The parade starts and 10:00 am at the corners of Olive & Palm in Fresno. If you want to be with us, come around 9:00-9:30. We would also love to have volunteers help out with our booth and interact with the crowd. Contact us for more information!
I had read this book and found that Being neighbors to a straight couple and certain boundaries can feel like they have been possibly crossed not only may exist in Ca, but in Florida as well as any other place. I used to live with my ex of 3 years and the rest of the families around us were straight. I used to get the look from the women like I was wearing a scarlet letter and they had to keep an eye on me, (although little did they know I was the top). The men would look at my ex as though he was going to make a play for the wives, (little did they know he was the bottom). Although we had many attempts to befriend and ease the tension the invisible walls stayed up. So what if the barriers had been crossed? Reading this story gave me a glimpse of what could have happened not only to each person in the relationship but to each person as an individual. Check this out!
His acclaimed breakout novel, Back Where he Started, Jay Quinn thrilled and surprised readers with his portrait of a middle-aged gay man who suddenly finds himself single and seeking out a new life, and if possible, a new love. Quinn continues his themes of love and need and of wanting to belong, with this revealing, cautionary tale of the best friends and even more, best of neighbors.
On a sunny block inside the exclusive neighborhood of Venetian Vistas, Rory Fallon is walking his dog when he notices activity at the house next door. New neighbors are moving in, namely the Hardens-Austin and his wife, Meg, along with their two kids. Rory introduces himself, and can’t help but notice how intrigued
Austin
is when it is mentioned just who Rory lives with: his partner of many years, handsome Bruno Griffin. Indeed, the last thing
Austin
expected in this small
Florida
enclave was having a gay couple for neighbors.
But life has more surprises in store, for both Rory and Austin, and Bruno and Meg. As the two couples form a strange, sometimes symbiotic relationship, questions arise about love and about marriage, and how their own roles help define-and alter- the people around them. A modern-day Scenes from a Marriage, Jay Quinn’s The Good Neighbor not only reflects our changing social fabric, but sheds light on the fact that fences exist for a reason, and that when you cross over them the consequences can often have confounding results.
“Jay Quinn is… a deft story teller. The story is warm, inviting and thoroughly satisfying.” –
New York
Blade
“A gorgeous celebration of ove and family. Beautifully touches and lifts the heart.” – Paul Russell, author of The Coming Storm
This movie is a great light comedy of attraction, awkwardness of dating and getting to know each other, gay or straight.
"4 friends – 3 guys – 2 couples… you do the math”
I loved how it gives you a sense of rollercoaster context, you want to root for the under dog but you want to choke the under dog to give up and cut his losses and search else where. It also can make for a fun date movie or a night in with your partner and a bowl of popcorn.
A contemporary romantic comedy about the universal for that one true love, All Over the Guy, centers on an unlikely pair of two twenty-somethings, Eli (Dan Bucantinsky) and Tom (Richard Ruccolo), who are thrown together by respective best friends. They do everything they can to not fall for each other, but ultimately it’s in the small moments of truth – the talk among trusted friends and the fear between new lovers- that the two ultimately find their way to a love that will last.
Special appearances by Andrea Martin—Joanna Kerns—Christina Ricci
MEET IN THE MIDDLE - This Weekend In The Central Valley
Written by Chris Jarvis
Thursday, 28 May 2009
There's a big weekend coming up. The Central Valley doesn't see this kind of weekend very often. We will be the focus of a lot of media attention and we'll have a lot of opportunities to SPEAK OUT about the California Supreme Court Decision to uphold Prop 8. We can also LISTEN, LEARN, SHARE, CONTRIBUTE, CO-OPERATE & HAVE A GOOD TIME...
The Supreme Court will be announcing their verdict on Prop 8 this Tuesday, May 26th around 10:00am. Please join us in Visalia that evening to let our voices be heard!! We will join in devastation or celebration. WE NEED YOU THERE!
When: Tuesday, May 26th at 6:00 pm
Where: Tulare County Courthouse in Visalia, 221 S. Mooney Blvd.
There is power in numbers!! We only have 4 days to get the word out, please help and tell your family, friends and neighbors. Heck, complete strangers will work too! :)
Meet in the Middle for Equality in Fresno will be March 30th. Join us for this epic event. Be a part of history!
COME OUT, COME OUT, WHEREVER AND WHOEVER YOU ARE!!
THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY @The North Tower Circle in Fresno
Written by Chris Jarvis
Tuesday, 19 May 2009
We're celebrating married same sex couples on the one year
anniversary of the first day of legal same sex marriage in California.
On Wednesday, June 17th, from 8-10PM, the North Tower Circle will be
hosting THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY.
We welcome all same sex couples married during last year's period of
legal same sex marriage. Complimentary glass of champagne, appetizers
and complimentary cheesecake courtesy of Indulgence Fresno. We'll also
have music, photography, party favors and entertainment.
THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY is a fundraiser for Marriage Equality and there will be a $10 door charge for couples.
The North Tower Circle is located at 2777 N Maroa, Fresno CA 93704 (559) 229-4188
Join us at pride and help make a difference! We need YOUR help!
Fresno Rainbow Pride is June 6th, starting at 10 AM.
Please come out and show your support for GayFresno.com, GayVisalia.com and GayHanford.com. We're looking for individuals and groups who would like to join in our parade entry this year. Come out, BE SEEN and make a difference! We'll have great stuff to give out along the parade route.
Also, GayFresno, Marriage Equality USA and the Fresno LGBTQ social group are getting together during the festival that immediately follows the parade, to find supporters. We need volunteers to help us speak with people who are attending pride. Volunteer for as long as you wish.
With the upcoming CA Supreme Court ruling we need to get in touch with our supporters and talk to our future allies!
If you are interested in either, please contact us...
Not sure you are going yet? Take down my number and give me a call or text if you are at pride and would like to help: 559-862-4559
Lawrence King
When I first heard of the federal case for same sex
marriage I agreed with some of the things I read. Maybe this was the wrong
time. Maybe it was doomed to fail, based on the history of other challenges
which weren't supported by a majority on a state level. 
As
much as LGBT Americans have against them in 2009, it seems almost insignificant
compared to life in the 1960's. Social repression in the 1950's and before
resulted in a wave of rebellion in the 1960's. LGBT Americans migrated to
larger cities, and established a sizable population in Greenwich Village,
NY. The city had laws against homosexuality in public and private
business, but policing all places of business was a strain on authorities.
Since there were few places LGBT people could gather safely, bars were the
hangouts. 
Last year I highly recommended the
HBO Documentary, "
Phone Bank Session
Tulare/Kings Co. Phone Bank
We're celebrating married same sex couples on the one year
anniversary of the first day of legal same sex marriage in California.
On Wednesday, June 17th, from 8-10PM, the North Tower Circle will be
hosting THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY.
We welcome all same sex couples married during last year's period of
legal same sex marriage. Complimentary glass of champagne, appetizers
and complimentary cheesecake courtesy of Indulgence Fresno. We'll also
have music, photography, party favors and entertainment.